Midget porn, weddings, and drinking for Jeebus

Last night, my good buddy Garrett got married so I went to the wedding and the dance afterwards. I was coming off two funfilled late nights at The Plains so I knew i had my work cut out for me if I wanted to make it through one more hardcore night. It's amazing what some Red Bull can do. I am seriously addicted to that stuff now... it definitely works wonders. The wedding ceremony was short and sweet, although I prefer the more secular ceremonies instead of the religious ceremonies. At 5pm, me, Zubazz, Tina, Gianni, and Chris went to Montana's for some food and some pre-dance sociables. Montana's is supposed to be a family restaurant, but we shure changed that in a hurry! We had some of the most fucked up conversations EVER. Somehow, we got onto the topic of midget porn. Just as Zubazz asked us "Have you guys ever seriously WATCHED midget porn?" our 18 year old waitress walked up to our table. Her eyes were as big as saucers. We were definitely her most entertaining table of her night. Then we started making some sacriligious jokes and comments regarding Jesus/Jeebus and talking about burning down churches and things of that nature. Some sample jokes of the night... "Jesus never died a virgin..he was nailed 3 times." And then the running theme of the night, which carried onto the wedding was that we were all "drinking for Jeebus." Cuz Jeebus would've wanted it that way. We were definitely the FUN table at the wedding dance. One of Garrett's friends decided that it was a good idea to eat some live fish form the mini fishbowls at the table. Garrett's friend Trevor decided to hit every table and take as much free wine to our table as possible. This sort of mayhem ensued til about 1:00, when me, Zubazz and a few of us decided to hit The Plains to catch the last part of B!LF's set. It's around this time that the details kind of get sketchy for me. For some reason it seemed like a good idea to go to Web Jay's place for an after party. I remember trying hard not to pass out on the couch, but I failed miserably...although I could hear some people heckling me for passing out. April was my designated babysitter from that point in, so I have to thank her for that. Red is definitely good. If it isn't painfully obvious to others when I am completely hammered, it's always a dead giveaway when I start saying "God am I ever HAMBONED!" a lot. For some reason, I always say "hamboned" when I am hammered. So I am now trying to recover from on of the funnest weekends in recent memory. It's gonna be lay low time for a little while...until later on this week for Me and Tina's annual birthday week extravaganza.